I'm in a very reflected mood today and I'm trying to piece together what I'm going to do with my life regarding the next 5 years. So being in my reflective mood I'm doing a '21 things I've learnt in my 21 years of living'
1. It's ok to be lazy.
I'm one of those people that feels guilty if I don't do anything productive to my future. From kicking myself for sleeping in, to just procrastinating in bed watching TV. I always feel like I have to be doing something even if it's sitting up at my desk (watching TV lmao) But over the last couple of months I've started to grow a healthy relationship with being ok with myself for having that afternoon off just doing nothing. Recharging batteries, having 'me' time.
2. You're not going to be friends with everyone and not everyone wont want to be friends with you.
Growing up I had my fair share of issues with other kids in the playground and bullying, though out my whole middle and high school experience, I was a people pleaser. I wanted to be liked by everyone and looking back now.. fuck I wasted so much time on people who I'm not even friends with now?! I wish i knew then what I know now and that's it the people that love you, you should be worrying about and not people who wouldn't give you a second look.
3. Things you want, take time and effort and they don't just happen with a click of a finger.
I always had a good role model in my life and that being my mum. I was always sheltered growing up about the value of money and if I worked hard enough I'd get it, but I never struggled. Now I'm in a position at 21 year old where things I want aren't happening instantly and I do have to give not only hard effort but also time for these things to fall back into place. Just because they don't happen instantly doesn't mean they wont happen.
4. The law of attraction really is a thing!
See this is a newbie. This isn't something I've know for a while but the last month I've been really getting into reading 'The Secret' If it's something you don't own or haven't heard of, I beg you to get it! It's changed my life and I haven't even finished the book yet. If you're a big believer in fate and everything happening for a reason you'll be so open to what this book can offer you. Even people around me have noticed a difference in me about the way I handle certain situations etc.
5. It's cool to be smart.
This is something again I wished I didn't fuck up at from a young age. I honestly would love to say I got maths at school and got all A*'s in my GCSE's and could go off and do Law at university. Even just getting 90% of the questions right on The Chase would be an achievement for me. It's not that I don't think I'm smart. I just wish I was an all rounder. I honestly thought if I didn't care about the cool kids at school I would be somewhere completely different, but I'm happy that I'm smart in other things, somethings that people know nothing about. I admire the people that love education and just 'get it'
6. Money is just money. It's replaceable.
Now this I get off my mum 100000%. If I was down to my last £10 and if a mate or my boyfriend I would give it to them. To me money is replaceable and if it meant seeing someone else happy with that last note, dam right I'd give it to them. This in the past has certainly been abused by fake friends but I have such a good group of people around me they know it's out of a good heart and not vulnerability.
7. It's ok to cry and be unhappy.
This ones pretty selfexplaintory. It's fine to wake up and feel sad for the day, we're all human and aren't programed to be happy all the time. ITS OK TO CRY.
8. It's ok to forgive people that have hurt you.
This is a tough one for me because I hate the thought of being mugged off. For sure I've forgiven people that have hurt me because it's not worth holding the extra hassle. Forgive and don't forget.
9. Not all family members will love you the way you should be loved.
Yep.
10. People who have shaded you in the past will soon jump on that they know you when you're doing well.
This doesn't necessarily affect me, but I've seen it happen to so many people. This kind of ties in with the family members. I know when I announced some good news on FaceBook, my dad suddenly wanted to be my dad again hahaha.
11. Being yourself is the most rewarding thing EVER!
Since coming out of my shell this year, I've been so much happier. Not caring about what strangers thing in public places when I'm throwing myself round the dancefloor.. sober.. because I'm having fun and living life the way I want too! You don't feel as restricted because you actually feel free.
12. You're allowed to not have a life plan
up until last year I always had a plan. like literally.. everything was planned for the next 5 years and I always liked having a plan. But until that plan fucked up the last year I've been literally living the moment and it's the best but more scariest decision I've ever made. One of the decisions I'm glad I took control over.
13. Being totally obsessed with someones company and knowing they are obsessed with you in an amazing feeling
I know this sound really bizarre but when you just look forward to being in someones company and getting the feeling they love you company as well its such a good feeling!! I tend to get really paranoid about people and if they actually like/want to spend time with me, so it's refreshing to feel like people want you around.
14. Sitting in your room all day everyday isn't healthy. As much as you don't like people
When I first discovered Tumblr when i was 13/14 all I would do is sit in my room with the blinds down and blog all day everyday. I became so obsessed with the Internet and hated contacting with people when I could just do it online. The outside is our friend and you can do everything you like doing inside. outside.
15. Music is life. Life is music.
Music has gotten me though so many tough times in my life and has also enhanced memories and moods. I love the feeling of listening to a song and having a flood of memories play over in my head.
16. It's ok to say no!
If you don't want to do anything you don't want to do. Just say NO.
17. Ex's are ex's for a reason.
I've always lived by the rule of an ex is an ex for a reason and I honestly still and probably will stand by that for the rest of my life.
18. We don't stay young forever so do the stupid shit that people will stare at you for.
I've been living by this for about 6 months now and it makes me feel SO happy! Live life to the full because you cannot buy back time, so do crazy stuff and make mistakes when you can afford to make mistakes.
19. Having a girl group/girl band is the most rewarding thing in the world.
Having a super close girl group is great for the mind and soul. Girl talk is the perfect medicine to cure any heartache or life's struggles.
20. If you don't get that job interview. It's not the end of the world.
As annoying as it is. There are more jobs.
21. My mum is my best friend, even if I didn't think it growing up.
She's the one that shapes you into the amazing young person you are and as much as we thought she was against us growing up, she's the only person that had your back no matter what you did. Respect and love her the way she loves you. (Shout out mummy Sarah, I love you doll you super star!)
Writing this post honestly took me longer than I thought. It's actually quite difficult to think of everything you've learnt over the years of you living. I've had ups and downs but I wouldn't trade my life for the world. What's your most important life lesson you've learnt? Let me know in the comments or over in my ask box in my description box on the right side.
Mucho Loveo
Elle x
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